Friday, April 15, 2011

"New Decade. New Rules." - Scream 4

It's a new installment to the Scream series, which means: Some New Rules for the New Millennium. Here are, in my humble movie-viewing opinion, some of the new rules of the horror movie genre:

  1. Then: anyone can be the killer. Now: anyone can be the victim. (Even the main character can sacrifice him/herself.)
  2. Archetypal stereotypes are out, body counts are in. Killers need to keep their body-count numbers up
  3. Yup, that means virgins can die.
  4. Body-counts and complexity level of the kill will always rise with each installment.
  5. On the bright side, the rest of those pesky archetypal constraints of last century are totally non sequitur- African Americans, ugly people, hotties, Asians, drug dealers, and addicts all can actually survive.
  6. In order to survive, you must gain something valuable from the experience.
  7. To survive, don’t dilly-dally, chances are you’re being timed.
  8. You’ll be strapped down. If you cry… you die.
  9. To survive, assess the situation immediately and don’t spend all that time “coming to.” (Really, all of this could have been avoided if you just grabbed that key in the beginning before it went down the drain.)
  10. Don’t check your cell phone; you won’t have a signal and it’s a death wish.
  11. Don’t expect a chase sequence. This is the new lazy America, expect to be kidnapped or drugged in a quick, clean, efficient manner.
  12. Even more lazy- Killers don’t get their hands dirty… It's ok to rely on an indoctrinated minion, desperate hostage or even a god damn puppet-thing on a bike (ps- multiple killers are no longer a surprise).
  13. Even MORE lazy- Killer abdicates responsibility. They will control your choices by putting the victim’s life in your hands (“See little Sue on the monitor… she will die if you don’t make me a sand which now”).
  14. Surgical tools, technology/machines are the new ax and chainsaw.
  15. The cleaner and more efficient the kidnapping is, the more tense, rusty, highly inefficient your death will be.
  16. Expect extreme death. Unstoppable contraptions and slow mutilating torture will be your demise now (really makes you long for the quick stab to the heart).
  17. Made in the USA- Though everything is rusted through and compiled from a garbage dump with no obvious fuel source, the duct tape and Elmer’s glue will hold… These mechanisms aren’t going to fail or fall apart. Sorry.
  18. Despite being incredibly complex, these mechanisms don’t require a high-level degree in engineering, physics or construction… it can easily be done by some handicapped janitor.
  19. EVERYTHING is being recorded. Despite no power outlets or connections you ARE being watched.
  20. If it’s a remake- old rules apply. Remember guys, the original was always better.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Top 10+ Activists Caught Being Gay:

Here is a short (and recent) list of anit-gay gay leaders. The ones who vote against gay legal rights, marriage, simple anit-bulling laws for children, and even adoption rights. These are the "wicked witches of the westvillege." ;-)

In the list are:

  • George Rekers
  • Pastor Eddie Long
  • Troy King
  • Richard Curtis
  • Ted Haggard
  • Glenn Murphy Jr.
  • David Dreier
  • Bruce Barclay
  • Roy Ashburn
  • Jim West
  • Larry Craig
  • Ed Schrock
  • Robert Allen
  • Mark Foley

Check it out here:

But it totally miss some of the others like Bush Campaign Manager Ken Mehlman, the handful of Ronald Reagan's gay advisors, Michael Bussee and Gary Cooper who worked in Exodus Gay Elimination (and left each other's wives to run away together), along with fellow former Exodus leaders Jeremy Marks and Darlene Bogle, each outted as gay or lesbian. Also, Focus on the Family's John Paulk, a well-known "ex-gay" public figure and Chairman of Exodus International, was removed by Exodus International Board of Directors due to his constant sex with other men. Washington's Spokane Mayor James West (R) an opponent of gay rights, went to court for accusations of having molested two boys while he was a sheriff's deputy and Boy Scout leader and came under investigation (2005) for offering municipal jobs to men he met in gay online chat rooms, or Republican Jeff Gannon admitted to being a $200/day gay prostitute in 2005. What about the men and women who would eat their own young-- like Dick Cheney who's daughter is gay, or Ronald Regan who's son is gay.

ESPN/CNN writer, LZ Granderson, had a wonderful article on this topic called: Closeted anti-gays are the enemy within.

"The gay and lesbian community has plenty of Uncle Toms trying to blow us up from inside, but what we don't have is our own word or phrase to identify them. Some call them "closet cases," but there is a difference between someone who is unwilling to live openly and honestly, and someone who takes that a step further and hurts those who do [...] People like Rekers, a Baptist minister who was paid to testify against gay adoption and travel the globe preaching that therapy can "cure" gay people, do not deserve the same sympathy given to those who are afraid of losing their jobs. Not when they consciously morph from being victims of homophobia to attack dogs eating their young."

Friday, February 12, 2010

Let's Look at the Resemblance: One Nation's Marriage Based in Bible

There is a bill pending in the Bahamas which would outlaw marital rape, and it is facing a lot of opposition. There is a common theme in the arguments against it: see if you can figure out what it is.

"It is ridiculous for them to try to make that a law, because I don't think a man can rape his own wife. After two people get married, the Bible says that they become one - one flesh. How is it possible to rape what is yours?" asked Mr. Sutherland.

"Even if a woman says no to her husband it still can't be considered rape because she is his wife. He already paid his dues at the church and she already said 'I do,' so from then on, even if [a man] forces sex on his wife, it isn't rape," he said.

"I disagree with the bill because I disagree that a man can rape his wife. The Bible tells me that a man's body is his wife's and her body is his. How could he rape her?" asked Ms. Sweeting.

It looks to me as if being brought up with a belief in the literal truth of a misogynistic document like the Bible can inculcate the evil idea that women are possessions, and that marriage is an act of handing over a woman's bill of sale to a man. I thought a wife was a partner, not a slave.

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Popular Poetry, Pantomime

Marcus Lane

Don't cry, this kiss is a kiss goodbye.
Don't cling, it's time to part.
Don't look at me nor ask me why
I've taken back my heart.

No questioning, no pleading;
No door remains ajar.
No doubt your heart is bleeding,
Deep wounds will leave a scar.

Don't hope to ever turn back time,
Nor resurrect the flame
Of what's become a pantomime
Of love, in all but name.

Friday, January 29, 2010

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Hilarious Breaking Story on Yahoo! Homepage Today

Today, I had the pleasure of logging into Yahoo!’s Homepage and seeing a comical “news article” as the main headline. Littered with grammatical errors, erroneous journalism tactics, unabashed opinions and, most of all, hilariously inappropriate innuendo.

Let me start with the author's choice word in the title. Within the bold, size 15 font in the actual title- “gropes” right next the Presidents picture. "Reality Check: President Gropes." That is an extreme word with strong sexual and violent connotations not usually attributed to our nations first black President, so I read on.

But wait! There is more than just synonms for rape, there's also "erogenous zones." Yes, it gets better, following the groping with this sentence: “touching every political erogenous zone he and his advisers can think of...” Hahaha, are you serious! "touching" ha! But there is more...

And then the writer follows that up with “inescapable that his 69-minute speech” …wait, what? Generally, with time measurement and in proper grammar once it reaches past 60 mins you attribute that to 1 hour. I mean no one would say: his 4,140 second speech. It should say 1:06 mins. But 69! So, I guess there is an exception when the number can be added up to equal a popular sex move. (And to be exact it was actually 1:09:44.)

There is more, the writer then took full advantage of the term “bang.” “talk then was of a presidential big bang.” And continues to loosely use bang for the rest of the article. "With the banging..."

And then winds down to his final thought... something about “revealed in real-time a president groping.”

Ha ha ha ha hahahaha. WHAT KIND OF CRAP IS THIS. This is the top story! Let me remind you Yahoo! receives 477 million unique monthly visitors. The story is from Politco, a blog. Generally, I don’t mind bloggers having fun, or expressing opinion or breaking their “journalistic integrity” but that’s because Blogs stay in the realm of Blogs, all while The Associated Press and Reuters stay in the realm of information and newsfeeds.

What, the AP, Reuters, International Herald, NY Times, or Washington Post didn’t have a story on the President’s freakin’ State of the Union address! What a piece of crap journalism editing. I am not sure what is wrong with Yahoo!’s New Editorial Team, or if there is one, but I find it irresponsible and reprehensible to professionally report a blog (though fine it its own realm) as a main source for news information. Sure, this story was hilarious as shit, but wildly unprofessional and given as fact for millions of consumers. No integrity.

As for John F. Harris, he ended his piece with “In many ways his tone belittled the speech’s substance.” Your tone, sir, belittle your entire writing capability.

Check it out for yourself-

Friday, January 22, 2010

Obama Rank: Promise Kept or Change Achieved?

THIS IS GREAT!!!! Politifact has been counting up Obama’s post-election success and pre-election promises. I have been trying to do the same… but this guy was far more successful- stupid office work, family, social life and boyfriend getting in the way of my obsession of tracking and measuring... things and stuff. Check our this amazing Obamameter from the St. Petersburg Times newspaper:

"PolitiFact has compiled more than 500 promises that Barack Obama made during the campaign and is tracking their progress on our Obameter."
The pole contrasts Promises Kept, Compromised, Promises Broken, Stalled, In the Works. There are a few pieces I would like to point out, firstly that it has only been one year since taking the oath and I cant seem to remember any other president that has received such unprecedented attention for only a single year in office, perhaps it is because of my second point. 2- These are some massive issue and yes, that is probably why so many are so impatient and are receiving a lot of attention thus for only one year I can understand where “In the Works” is an important measurement for meter. Thirdly, I take issue with the term “Compromised” as its own singular force. I would like to remind everyone of his initial promise to reach across the aisle and:
“A good compromise, a good piece of legislation, is like a good sentence; or a good piece of music. Everybody can recognize it. They say, 'Huh. It works. It makes sense.”

“I think that there's a tradition of us working together to make sure that we are dealing with the threats that are out there and that we are building a consensus here in the United States. That's the kind of approach I intend to take when I'm president of the United States.”
With all this, allow the numbers still speak for themselves- do the math and add it up, 124 accomplishments, 276 working towards and 16 lost of about 505.

I wish this was on Stumble, or trending topics, or even Digg. But I don’t think people are as excited NOR really want to be informed. From what I have experienced (regardless of the facts) if people like him- he has kept his promises, if people don’t like him- then he just hasn’t. Not much middle ground, not much fact-base, not much anything beyond “well, I feel that he has…..” But that’s why I want people to really look at it.

Get informed and inform others.